shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I wear drunk well.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize