Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
