so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
