I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize