so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
