so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
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