Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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