I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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