and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Randomize
