i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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