Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
