is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
i out mim tonsoeep
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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