so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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