he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
