Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
