Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I want a musical about memes.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
