Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
