it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
