normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
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