Don't you send me to vm
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Randomize
