Sponge bath it is.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Randomize