All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Randomize
