Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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