he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
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