Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
