hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
