what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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