Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize