we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
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