I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize