I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
