I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Randomize