I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
