Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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