We won't sleep together?
I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
