"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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