'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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