ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
