I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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