so let's talk penis.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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