just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
