I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
