pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Randomize
