Are we in a gay sports bar?
You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
My Higher Power is John Stamos
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I am mentally ready for anal.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
