He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
My bed smells like the plague
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Randomize
