now i know why i became what i already was.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
