Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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