I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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