Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
