I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
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