I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
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