Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Randomize
