I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
